Tuesday, September 15, 2009

mom

I hadn't prayed for along time. I didn't feel comfortable praying. I felt like if I prayed God would say, "don't be gay." and "break up with the Becka." and then scream over and over "DON'T BE GAY!" He didn't. He said that He loved me. And He comforted me. And then in the morning He reminded me that He said that by letting me hear the birds outside my window and allowing the sun to peak through the blinds. I was humbled. I love God. He love me too.

The last few months have been LONG. I went through a few health problems, got real homesick, my home in Utah had some major water problems, my girlfriend got laid off, I had a few visits from people from home, I went and visited home-Becka came too and we turned the trip into a Western United States road trip, and in a few weeks I'm planning on getting a new puppy.

However, the most important/thought consuming/pressing thing that has happened in the last few months is the up and down health of my mom. My mom is a fighter. My mom IS A FIGHTER and, in my opinion, has been through more than any person should ever have to go through-but that isn't for me to decide-it's just what life has in store for certain people. For anyone who reads my blog, please pray for my mom. And pass the word along. Her story is what got me on my knees again. I pleaded to God that she would be okay. That she would feel okay and be able to stay positive. I let Him know that I need a mom and that my little brother Curtis needs a mom and that the WORLD needs MY mom. Other people prayed for her. We had a family fast on Sunday-people in the ward and friends joined too. I believe, I truly believe, that the only thing that will help her is the love of her Heavenly Father-perhaps extended from the people around her. Read her blog to get more information.
My mom keeps our family together and has always taught us to be kind to each other-and to everyone. There is no one in my life who I'd like to be more like. She has the kindest heart, is fast to forgive and the fastest person I know at offering herself to help someone in need.

I love you, Mom!

8 comments:

Middle Age Moments said...

Oh my dear Bell, DOn't you ever ever forget how much our good Lord above loves loves loves you. He is always there, to answer our prayers, or help us out if we will but ask. Don't ever doubt that. You are a great example of Christlike living, the way you love and treat your fellow human beings. I am so proud of you, as I am all our children. dad and I are very blessed! Life is such a grand adventure, and I am very grateful. Love you.

iMzOOL said...

i love you chelsea. your mom and your family will be in my prayers. we have a loving Heavenly Father who is very aware of our needs and also has a plan for each of us. i love your family.

Catherine said...

I love you and I love your mom for bringing you into this world. I will be thinking and praying for her. Amazon, today I had the great opportunity to talk to my sister and friend today about how great you are. We got to talking about the gospel and being gay in the Church and it was so wonderful to tell them all about my best friend Chelsea who I admire, adore, look up to, learn from, and the struggles and the strengths that you have been through and are still going through. Your testimony is a strength and example to me and I love you my sweet, crazy, spiritual, beautiful friend. You are one of my favorites, ever!

Just wanted you to know that. :)

Ariel said...

Chelsea, your mom is such a neat woman. I will pray for her. I know that you and she have a special relationship and that you need her. Love you!

Alisha said...

Hey Ami... it's been a long time. I was thinking about you the other day and happened to run across your blog. Your Mom will for sure be in my prayers!

Anonymous said...

I remember your Mom and I do remember being impressed by her even when I was a snotty teenager and not much impressed me. I hope you and your family know how loved you are. I will pray for you all. And yes Chelsea, Heavenly Father loves you VERY much! You are so awesome!

Lamb Fam said...

Hey. I just got your Facebook message via email but it won't let me log in due to site maintenance- so here I am on your blog.
I miss you, too! I've actually been thinking about you a TON lately. I don't know if it's because I haven't talked to you in a while or because of something else. I just hope you're happy. Little Harley is absolutely ADORABLE! I'm waiting for the Harley post on here. BTW- I was at a neighborhood girls night on Wednesday and a bunch of them told me that they read your blog. It's fascinating to a lot of people that you are a lesbian with a testimony of the Gospel. Speaking of, DON'T EVER EVER forget the love that our Father in Heaven has for you. He is SO proud of you, Chel. You are an amazing person. And please don't lose that testimony. It has formed the person you are. I know there's lots of question marks but Heavenly Father does love you no matter what.
... oh- and so do I.

joanburdett said...

Chel,
Hey girl, I have been looking for you in all the wrong places, but looks like I finally found you.
I need for you to contact me about a ropes course construction book that I loaned to you a few years back. It belongs to Jack and he would very much like to have it back. Since it is his only copy and I let you take it, I hoping you can get it to me.
Hope all is well in Washington. My sister use to live there, and still has a home in Depont, near Olympia.
Please email me back.
joanie1@burgoyne.com
Joan Burdett